Bachpan Ke din bhi kya din the

I have very good memories of my childhood. My parents always gave us the best of everything they could. We were actually pretty spoilt as kids but don’t tell my son I said this. We all like to think of our childhood as the good old days but seriously, is being an adult really all that bad?

When my parents first broached the subject of getting married, I freaked out! I wasn’t ready to be an adult yet. I wanted to enjoy my carefree days for some more time. I didn’t want to lose my independence and I dreaded the idea of having to deal with grumpy in laws. I had been fed on a diet of Hindi movies and television serials where a girl’s life after marriage was anything but fun and I didn’t want that for myself. I was always fiercely independent and valued my ideas and independence very much.

So of course when my parents ‘coaxed’ (read forced) me to speak to my husband-to-be on the phone, I didn’t want anything to do with it. I was very unresponsive and didn’t want to answer any of his questions or ask any of mineJ. In spite of my indifference, he came all the way from Visakhapatnam to Delhi to meet me. One thing led to another and a month later, I was married and on a flight to Dallas. In a matter of 4 weeks I went from being a spoilt brat to a (responsible?) adult. I was excited about being married mostly because he met most of my criteria for a husband (the only one he didn’t fit was being 6 feet tallJ) and I loved my in laws (they weren’t very grumpy you see). Even though I was excited, I was unsure of what it meant to be married and what it meant to be an adult. I remember thinking that it was the end of my life as I knew it. It really was the end of my life as I knew it but it was also the beginning of some of the most memorable years of my life.

The first five years of married life in USA were an ongoing celebration of life. We had a great circle of friends in Dallas. I did things that as a child I didn’t even dream of ever being able to do. We played games almost everyday. After I went to college, I didn’t think I was ever going to ‘play’ anything more strenuous than LUDO. That changed when I moved to Dallas. I learnt to play tag football, Baseball, basketball and volleyball. I had played a little bit of volleyball in school but never to this extent and never with guys who took the competitive spirit to the next level. I hated it when some of the guys would rush past me to ‘save’ the game and return the ball to the other court. I was calm and nice about it at first but eventually I ‘fought’ back :).

We went camping and actually slept in tents under the sky. I had seen images of camping trips like that in movies but never thought I would do it some day. We actually put up our own tents and cooked our own food on a bonfire. We played loud ‘Antakshari’ late into the night and went on a hike the next day. I had been on a camping trip with my school when I was in the 10th grade and I thought that was the last time I had slept in a tent.

I have even learnt how to ski. We would go on ski trips almost every year and one year a group of friends made the trip twice. I learn to ski in TAOS, New Mexico. It is the most amazing feeling ever. I was scared to death while getting off the ski lift and the first time I came down the slope I was sure somebody was going to run into me from behind or I would run into something or somebody but once I got the hang of it, I didn’t want to stop. Never in my life had I ever thought or even wanted to try skiing but I tried it and I loved it.

I enjoyed my experiences during those years but the best part was being able to learn Kuchipudi. I don’t remember when I started dancing but ever since I can remember I had enjoyed dancing and being on the stage. I enjoyed all the attention you see. I had learnt Kathak as a child but had to discontinue it as I got older. Although I didn’t stop dancing (to filmi and folk numbers) I didn’t think I would ever have the inclination or the opportunity to take formal training again. I started learning Kuchipudi seven years back and even after having a kid, I haven’t stopped or even slowed down. In fact I started taking music lessons after I had my kid and I enjoy them immensely. Dance and music have become an integral part of my life; they are the stress relief I badly need sometimes J

We all have our fair share of stress as adults but we were not immune to it even as kids. Remember exams? I was scared to death during exams, mostly because I was too lazy to study. We all had the pressure to do better than everybody else (‘xyz ko tumse zyada marks kaise aaye?’) And it wasn’t restricted to studies either. You would also sometimes hear “How come you came second in the race. Why not first?” “Debate competition mein third kyon aaye? First kyon nahin” ( I guess nobody told our parents about positive reinforcement)

I didn’t consider myself and adult until I got married and so far I have had a good life as an adult. I thought I was too old to learn something new but the last 8 years have taught me that you are never too old, too fat, too big, too small or too anything to try something new. A lot of people talk about the good old days of childhood when we didn’t have a care in the world, didn’t have to worry about work, bills, kids etc. I had a lot of fun as a child but I have found that being an adult is not so bad either.